Sunday, March 24, 2013

Hey yall....
I am coming to you today with a very heavy heart, and I wanted to share with you all something that I have been struggling with for quite some time.
Anyone that knows me knows that I want to be a mother. I am the youngest of five, and have always wanted a big family. My hubby is from a much smaller family, so our visions didn't exactly match, but we both want kids.
What some people don't know is that we have been trying for almost 3 years to start our family. We haven't always tried consistently every month for those years, but I would say about 80% of the time. We did take a break when we moved to Atlanta a few years back, but started trying again once we were settled.
When we finally moved back to Augusta last May, we decided it was time to seek help. I went to the doctor and told her all about my struggles. She assured me that everything would be fine, but she would run some tests just to make sure. Of course, this meant the hubby would be subjected to some tests as well, which he was not excited about!
But he was all cleared by the doctor, so the focus turned to me. After completing some tests, the doctor told me that I was not ovulating and prescribed me to two different medications: Metformin and Clomid. I started taking Metformin first, and then started the Clomid two months later.
Well, I have now been taking Clomid for about 5 months and....nada. The doctor told me she would only allow me to take it for six months before referring me to a specialist.
The drug is doing its job, though, as I have been having regular positive ovulation tests. For some reason, though, we have still been unable to get pregnant.
My husband and I are at the age where most of our friends our married with children. Actually, we have been married for longer than most of our friends, yet they have all had children before us...some even multiple children! I am always so happy for each couple when I hear they are expecting, but a part of me cannot help but grieve for myself.
I got a text yesterday from a close friend that said she was expecting. My reaction? I immediately burst into tears...
Then I felt completely awful because a good friend would just feel joy. However, I can't help but think..."When will our time come?"
I wanted to share this with yall, because infertility is something that I struggle with each day. I feel like I am a complete let down for my husband, and spend each month praying that this will be the month.
Can anybody relate to my story? I need some encouragement and positivity yall. Any recommendations on what our next steps should be???
Sorry to bring the mood down today, but I just felt as if I needed to get this all out.


  1. I am so sorry to read about your struggles, but after reading, I did get an overwhelming feeling that God will send you what you want. It must be very hard to anticipate each month and then...nothing, but keep praying and I will start praying for you. Sometimes we have to step back and let God do it in His time. I know it isn't what you wanted to hear, but I just wanted you to know that prayers are being sent your way.

    <3 Janine

  2. I just teared up ready about your struggles! I had a very very similar situation. I changed doctors, got an answer, and then a baby! I won't go into all of the details of my situation here, but I will tell you my lack of ovulation was due to an overproduction of prolactin, the breastfeeding hormone. Ironic much?? We uncovered it with a standard blood test for hormones.

    I will be praying for you! Email me if you need to vent!

    My Teacher Friend

  3. My thoughts and prayers are with you as well. It is a struggle and it is hard especially when everyone around you seems to be having children. We waited 17 years and several surgeries and then God finally sent us our girl. We adopted her and she is 11 now and I don't know what I would do without her:)

  4. I will keep you in my prayers! God has a special plan for your life. I read a quote yesterday that relates to your situation.
    "There is a timing for all things in our lives, and there is safety in being in God’s perfect timing."

    Know that it is in God's hands! Keep the faith! Sending love, comfort, and prayers your way!
    Glitter and Glue

  5. I am so sorry! While I don't know what it feels like to not be able to have a child, I went through a similar thing when all of my friends were getting engaged. I so desperately wanted to get married and start a family, but hubby just wasn't ready. Every friend (the partiers and all) were getting married left and right. I would cry everytime I heard the news. It's okay to feel that way.
    I will pray for you! God has a special plan for you and your husband. It will be wonderful and well worth the wait I'm sure! I have lots of friends who had similar difficulties and they have beautiful children now! :)

    Kindergarten Korner

  6. Natalie, I am so incredibly sorry for what you are going through. One of my closest friends at work is facing the same thing. Nothing I can say will make it any easier, so you and your husband will be added to my prayer list for this dream to come true! I feel so blessed to have met you this summer and love reading your blog and all that you share. Know that many of us will be praying daily for this!


  7. Oh Natalie, I'm so sorry to hear about your situation :( Sending my thoughts and prayers your way...
    A Cupcake for the Teacher

  8. So sorry that you have to go through this, but know that soo many women seem to have this trouble and I did, too. I was luckier with my first son, we got pregnant with him after one dose of clomid, but it took one miscarriage, one surgery to remove a cyst, and four years for me to have another baby and actually, we were blessed with twins!!!! And the amazing thing is I had gone through clomid and the shot (I don't remember what drug that was) and had decided I was going to give my body a break, then low and behold I got pregnant. It'll happen! I'm just sorry you have to go through heartache before it does. :(
    Hang in there!!!!
    One Berry Blog

  9. Oh Natalie we are so sorry about your struggles and understand the sting that hearing other people's news must bring. There are no words that we can share to make what you're feeling go away, just encouragement to hang in there. And to also know that you have numerous blogging buddies praying for you and keeping you close to our hearts. Thank you for putting it out there and letting yourself be transparent. We are sending you double hugs and double blessings.

    ~Christy & Tammy
    Fluttering Through First Grade

  10. It's really touching to expect a 'teacher' post and then have someone share something so personal and important in their life. I can't share a similar story but I can tell you that I am hoping and wishing for you.



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